Blog to God

Thank you a really awesome half a weekend. It started out the usual bad way with her being difficult and just plain mean if that is the right word for it but Sunday was really really great. Such a wonderful time with my beauties and then to go out with my birthday girl and just relax was out of this world. Thank You so much for the opportunity you gave me to share it with them. I am so proud of them both, the way they have turned into such awesome, wonderful, beautiful young ladies under pretty hard circumstances. Even this morning was pretty good until the afternoon when she got all stupid, huffity and selfish again. She needs to realise that it is not all about her and not be so selfish. Yes I need to get around until the car is sorted out and it might be a bit difficult for her but I do so much for her. She believes I owe it to her but she is so quick to forget all that I have alwasy done in the past. I suppose it is like most people, they remember the bad things much quicker than the good. I really dont need that and just want to get on with my life. I would love it to be with her but not the way she is half the time, that I could not manage. I need to get on with it either way. I know it is hard when she holds me to "ransom" as she does and would love to have more so I could give my girls what they need and get on with my life at the same time. I know it is just another 8 years or so when the little one is out then ther eis no hold anymore. I dont want to be mean but that would have been 30 yrs of this so I think it would be time for me to have a few things for myself. This might sound really selfish and all about me but I am so tired of never having a little me time.

Lord please be with the rest of them as they go through their own difficult time and I know that it might sound like I am whining about something which is trivial compared to the problems that so many others have so if it is please forgive me. Lord I am ready to do what You have in store for me. I can only believe that all these things are tests of my faith and pray that I am doing ok because I am trusting You more all the time. I dont have anyone else to trust in or hope in and You have proved over and over that You are the one to come to my aid. Thanks You Lord. I ask in Jesus name that You bless us all.
Amen